Dating is hard enough but being a Christian can make it even harder. You are constantly challenged to find someone who shares your beliefs and values while at the same time fighting off temptation. Christian dating can be difficult because we try to hold ourselves to a slightly higher standard (it may not work all the time but at least we try). Since your belief in God plays a big role in your life, you want to try to remain true to those beliefs while at the same time find someone suitable to share your life with. If you are lucky, you can find a nice girl at your church. If not, then you have to get out there and mingle around in the hopes to find someone compatible. So what are some dating tips for Christian men? How can you balance faith and a relationship? This article is for all the Christian guys out there that might nee d a little help.
Stay True To Your Beliefs
So let’s say you are putting yourself out there on the available market. There are a lot of really hot girls to check out. But not all of them may have the same spiritual beliefs as you. Some may belong to a different religion while others do not claim any religion at all. It is natural to try to adapt to someone else’s standards in order to seem more attractive. But for Christian men, the trick is to remain true to your faith and values. You should never compromise your belief in God just to attract someone. That is putting others before God and that goes against the teachings of the Bible. If you want to find the right girl, hold to your beliefs. You are much more likely to find someone that you are compatible with and who can share or at least respect your Christian values.
God Will Not Do All The Work
We ask God to help us all the time with problems and difficulties. It is a part of our belief that we put our faith in Him. But when it comes to dating, God is not going to do all of the work for you. The perfect girl will not appear in a crowd surrounded by a white light and sporting a pair of angel wings. God will lend a hand but it is up to you to do all of the legwork. This means that you have to get out there and actively look for someone. You will have to meet a lot of girls (not altogether a bad thing) and get to know them. Some may be duds but with a little prayer and faith, you are bound to meet the right one eventually.
Know Your Girl
So what kind of girl should a Christian guy look for? With guys, physical attraction can play a big role but you should not fall prey to your passions. There are clubs, bars, and parties full of beautiful girls but that does not mean they will share the same beliefs in God as you do. This is just generalizing but a lot of girls that you meet in such places tend to be shallow, self-centered, and materialistic. They live in the here and now with no regard to their future or to living a healthy Christian life. As a Christian guy, you need to find a girl that you could have a future with. If you can’t see yourself married to who you are dating, then you are dating the wrong girl. Look for some common Christian traits such as honesty, compassion, and loyalty.
Where to Meet Her
Finding the right girl can be difficult. You may go on a lot of dates before you come across someone who is a good match. The most logical place to meet a girl that would have a lot in common with you would be at a church or a church-themed event. You would at least be guaranteed that she would have enough in common with you. You can even network your fellow Christian friends and peers to find someone compatible.
If church is not the right place (or there just aren’t any girls available) you can check out the internet. There are many online Christian dating sites and communities where you can meet someone. Just remember that anytime you meet someone online, you need to be careful. There is always the chance that they might not be who they say they are.
Speed dating has become popular with Christian dating. This is an event where groups of men and women get together and each person has a few minutes to talk with someone of the opposite sex. This is convenient because in a few moments you can find out enough of the basics about a person to see if there might be any chemistry there. This helps to save a lot of time in dating and keeps things safe because it is chaperoned.
Know How Far To Take Intimacy
No one is a saint but intimacy can always be a temptation. While some non-Christians may not exercise any boundaries, it is important to know just how far to go with a girl. Not all Christians are going to be a strict about physical intimacy. Some barely allow holding hands while others agree on kissing. Before you go down that road, you need to know the boundaries between you and your girl. Find out what she is and is not comfortable with. You also need to let her know the same about you. While the Christian belief on pre-marital sex is pretty much set in stone, and as a Christian you should do your best to follow it, no one is perfect. Sometimes passion gets away from you. So know where each of you stands in regards to intimacy before you cause something really awkward to happen.
Respect Her And Her Beliefs
The chances of you finding a girl with the same Christian values as you are slim. During your dating period, you are likely to go out with girls who have different beliefs or a different religion altogether. It is up to you whether this is important or not or if you need someone who shares your exact views. But no matter who you go out with, you should always respect her beliefs, especially if she respects yours. You should never criticize her beliefs or belittle them. That is just a good way to start an argument and hurt someone’s feelings. Practice tolerance and acceptance when dealing with any differences. As long as her beliefs and values do not contradict your own or offend you in any way, then all is good.
Don’t Be A Missionary
A common mistake Christian guys make is to get in a relationship and try to make a convert out of their girlfriend. This is a relationship, not a missionary trip to save her. Most girls do not feel like they need rescuing or religious conversion. If you try to change her ways and her beliefs, then you are setting yourself up for disaster. In the end it will only cause resentment and could end the relationship. Give them time to adapt and maybe in the long run they might decide to convert on their own.