End Your Internet Dating Slump
If your Internet dating life hasn’t been going well lately, learn tips for how to end your online dating cold streak.
Guys and girls who are in a dating slump wrack their brains trying to figure out what they’re doing wrong, but dating mistakes are sometimes hard to spot, if you’re in the middle of the habit.
Getting a few online dating tips help sort through the mess that singles life becomes sometimes.
People complain all the time that they don’t get enough follow-ups when people see their profile or get their emails, so here’s suggestions to try and pitfalls to avoid in the online dating community.
Be More Selective – Online Dating Advice for Men
Many men new to online dating websites tend to scattershoot: they send out dozens, if not hundreds, of generic winks and “hi’s” and emoticons. They assume that, if they put 300 buoys in the water, some lucky woman is bound to bite.
Instead, take your time, search through profiles of women you have things in common with and target your emails and chatlines to those women. Select likely love matches and put your effort into fewer profiles, but profiles that correspond to your likes and dislikes.
Be Less Selective – Online Dating Advice for Women
Women, on the other hand, tend to be a little too choosy in Internet dating cirlces. Because there’s a relationship site with thousands, if not millions, of available men, female online singles tend to raise their standards, sometimes to unrealistic levels.
If your profile says you only date men who make $150,000 a year, you’re probably not going to get many guys pinging you. You may be trying to separate the wheat from the chaff by raising the bar high, but this is probably driving away a lot of potentially good love matches.
Money isn’t the only parameter that hurts your chances. If you have unrealistic standards according to looks or location, this severely limits the scope of your online dating possibilities. The great thing about dating online is the huge pool of men to choose from, so reducing your options undercuts one of the great reasons to be dating online.
Avoid Generic Openings
First impressions are huge in live dating, and they’re huge in online dating. One of the great things about getting to know one another in a chat room, a forum or an email is that you can edit your thoughts. You have more time to be clever.
With that in mind, have a good opening line. Don’t throw out some generic line. Read the person’s profile and send an email tailored to that profile. Show you read what they wrote and found something interesting.
Not only does this show you’re interested in more than just their profile picture, but it stands out among all the other hellos and smiley faces this person is getting. Like online dating website tip #1, this is a matter of quality over quantity, taking the time to make one good opening, instead of 5 bad openings.
Have a Flattering Photo
Let’s talk about first impressions again. We’ve discussed pickup lines and opening sentences. But the first impression this guy or girl is going to have of you is your profile photographs. It’s pretty simply: if your photos suck, you suck.
Take time to post a good photograph of yourself. Dress up, take a nice photo with your smiling and post it. If you add any photos for the sake of “color”, making sure they’re flattering photos. Imagine this person is watching you perform whatever activity is being depicted in your picture, then ask yourself if you would want an attractive person of the opposite sex seeing you do that in person.
If the answer is “no”, then don’t post that as your profile picture.
Take a Hiatus
If nothing else seems to be working, take time off from online dating. Recharge your batteries. Get new stories and interests. Get some perspective.
People can try too hard.
In baseball, when a batter is in a slump, they do something called “pressing”. That is, they hold the bat too tightly. They swing too freely, or they swing for the fences too much. Whatever the case, they deviate from the plan and make the slump worse.
Getting away lets you clear your mind and refocus on what you’re doing. You get away and gain a little perspective. In baseball, they would call it getting your head on straight or “get your head right with ball”.
I know that’s terrible grammar, but it is ball field jargon. But enough with the sports talk.
Imagine an Internet dating slump, where you can’t think of one interesting thing to say to the opposite sex, is like writer’s block. You simply can’t think of the right words…right now.
Take time to renew yourself. Rejuvenate. Get new inspiration.
Once you’re away for a little while, you’ll probably find your online dating life is fresher and brighter and you have something to say again.
There’s no one way to succeed in online dating and there’s no one way to end your online dating cold streak. One any or all of the techniques above, to see if it changes you luck in the singles world.