Whole books have been written on how to impress a girl, but these points bear repeating. Guys who are new to the dating scene are going to have to learn their dating lessons, and it’s better to learn from a dating tips guide than the school of hard knocks. What’s worse, some guys never learn. I know one or two guys who’ve been at it for 20 years and still make the same mistakes they were making when they were 16.
Don’t be like that. Read the following ten tips to impressing girls. There are others, but these will do for today.
How To Impress a Girl
1. Groom Yourself – It almost never hurts to look your best. A recent poll showed that 94% of women find that greasy, unwashed hair is a turn-off. You’ll find that the numbers for things like body odor, bad breath and dirty clothes are also way into the turn-off category. If you want a woman to think about getting close to you, try washing and grooming your hair, wearing clean clothes, taking care of your hygiene and smelling nice.
That may seem like a no-brainer, but it isn’t. Guys often have trouble with the basics. So before you move on, let’s make sure we get the basics right.
2. Flirt – Trying flirting with a girl. This gives her a chance to flirt back and encourage a guy she thinks is cute, or shut you down, in which case you can move on to the next girl. Flirting builds a bridge between the two of you that she can walk across, instead of you coming on too strong. It’s neutral territory, in other words.
When you meet eyes with a girl, don’t look away. Instead, give her a subtle smile. Don’t be the first to look away. When she glances away, you do the same. Don’t turn it into a staring contest or a staredown. You don’t want to look aggressive. You want to look interested and confident.
If she continues to glance over your way, she’s probably interested. From here, try little gestures to show you’re interested, but don’t come on strong. Be courteous to her and let her know you’ve noticed her in a subtle way.
3. Have a Good Attitude – Having a good attitude is being upbeat and willing to have fun. If you’re sour all the time and nothing seems to please you, that’s a pretty unattractive trait. You may think you look discriminating, but it probably makes you look close-minded and negative to a fault.
More importantly, if everything she talks about, you have a bad attitude about, that’s really no way to make a connection. Don’t try to win an argument. Try to make a connection. Don’t try to change her attitudes. Change your own.
The fact is, people like being around people who are fun to be around. They enjoy people who like to laugh. Even better, they really enjoy people who make them laugh. Having a good attitude is having a good time. Try it.
4. Let Her Talk – Don’t drone on endlessly about what you did today and what you’re going to do tomorrow, especially if what you’re going to do isn’t likely to be interest a woman. When you stop talking about yourself and let her talk instead, you show an interest in her. Don’t just sit and listen, though.
Respond to what she says. Find out about more than what she looks like and what class she’s in. Ask her what interests her, what hobbies she has. Ask her about her favorite music, tv shows, movies and books. You don’t have to ask her about stuff that’s going to bore you to death. Keep asking questions until there’s something both of you enjoy talking about.
Don’t act like you’re trying to compile a file on her though, or else she’s going to think you’re a creep. When it’s your turn to talk, tell her about yourself and your likes and dislikes. When you’re said a short paragraph or two, ask her a question or redirect the conversation back to her.
5. Be a Good Conversationalist – Being a good conversationalist is talking well about something she’s interested in. Just because you like something, that doesn’t mean everyone else does. That statement goes double for girls. Do a little bit of self-analysis and figure out what women are likely to find interesting. Don’t talk about the stuff she’s not likely to enjoy, until you find out she does.
For instance, if you’re a big fan of hockey, don’t assume she is. If you enjoy XBOX 360, she’s not likely to. If all you can talk about is guy sports and video games, that’s not going to impress many girls. Find something else to talk about.
6. Don’t Give Speeches – I’ve spoken about this before, but let’s go over it again. Most romantic teen movies have the main guy mope around most of the movie pining over a particular girl who he thinks is way too hot for him. She has feelings for a more atheletic, more popular guy. Eventually, he gets up the courage to tell her how he feels, and he gives a speech. Against all odds, the speech works and she decides she’s in love with the guy, even though she hardly knew he existed moments before.
Don’t do any of that! None of it. Don’t mope. Don’t pine. Don’t stalk. And by all means, do not give a speech about how much you love her!
When you give a speech, you’ve just broken Love Tip #2, Love Tip #4 and Love Tip #5. When you mope, you’ve just broken Love Tip #3. You’re not very likely to impress a girl with a love speech. You’re likely going to come off like an obsessive stalker type who has nothing better to do than swing for the fences with a love speech.
So attract her by being well-groomed, having a good attitude, starting a conversation and letting her talk some.
7. Be Respectful – Showing someone respect does not reflect on that person: it reflects on you. If you’re continually rude to a person, you might think you’re showing how important you are. Eventually, though, that person is going to think, “You know, that loser is really rude.”
You might think that disrespecting someone shows a value judgment on them and therefore shows they aren’t worthy of respect, but unless your opinion is the end-all, be-all, they’re going to realise that being dispectful is just a trait of yours.
On the other hand, if you show respect to a girl and she at all thinks you’re cute, she’s going to think that’s a trait of yours. And that’s an attractive trait.
Besides, it’s hard to let her talk and it’s hard to be a good conversationalist when you won’t even show her basic respect. Show off your positive traits.
8. Be Funny and Joke Around – If a chance for an inside joke takes place, seize on it. When the two of you have an inside joke, it’s like having a little bond. You have an ice-breaker for the next time you meet one another and you show her you’re funny. Don’t overdo it, though, because there’s nothing worse than the guy who runs the inside joke into the ground.
9. Don’t Confide in Her You Like Her – I’m coming back to the speech point again. Don’t get her alone somewhere and tell her you like her. This makes her uncomfortable and puts her in an uncomfortable situation, where she has to tell you she isn’t interested.
Instead, show her you like you. Let her show you like her. Give her an out if she’s not interested by asking her out. But don’t “lay it on the line”. That’s a bad way to go about things. If she turns you down, be casual about it. Don’t make an already uncomfortable situation more uncomfortable with long pauses, nervous chatter, excuses, follow-up date proposals or whining.
And if you get to the point where she has to tell you she’s not interested, be casual, as if it’s not that big of a deal. Overplaying your hand will make you look like a loser and will not change her mind. Don’t give her the “But I reallly like you” bit, because it only makes you look desperate. Suck it up and look casual. That bit of smoothness might not win her over, but it extracts her from a potentially embarrassing situation and might impress her. Women like a challenge, so a guy who doesn’t seem to care whether she says yes or no might intrigue her.
10. Be Confident – Finally, show confidence. Showing confidence shows off your masculinity. It’s a sexual thing. Sexuality is displayed differently according to males and females. A woman shows off her sexuality by…well, you’re a guy – you know how women show off their sexuality. Guys do it in another way. It’s by showing off their masculinity and you do that in a number of different ways.
Confidence is the #1 trait in impressing a girl. It tells her you have something worth being confident in. Take up space by looking casual where you sit or stand, draping a hand or foot on an inanimate object. Walk with your shoulders high. Take slow, smooth, confident strides. Look people in the eyes. If someone insults her, take up for her in a respectful fashion.
You won’t impress a girl by showing off positive female traits, but by showing off positive guy traits. A good attitude, confidence, a sense of human, good conversation and good grooming go a long way in impressing girls.